Transitioning from work to home

Yes, it is a challenge to mentally transition from work to home. Listed below are several strategies that will help you to leave your work at work so you can have more mental and physical energy to invest in your personal life.

1) Make a to do list for the following day before your work day ends. If you have a planner, use it; otherwise, a piece of paper will do the trick. Before you end your workday, write down all the things you have to get done the following day. If you choose to do this consistently, you will experience a load being shifted from your mind onto a piece of paper. You’ll experience less stress, frustration, and anxiety.

2) Practice a transitional activity. Once your workday ends, find an activity that you can engage in that requires focus and allows no time for other thoughts. Examples of transitional activities include exercise, meditation, reading, etc.

3) Journal about your day. This is a powerful tool. Write about your day, including the good and bad. Once again a ton of stress, frustration, and anxiety will be lifted from your mind.

4) Make the decision to leave work at work. I’ll never forget a statement Les Brown made during one of his motivational speeches. Les stated that we can’t control what thoughts pop into our minds — but we can control what thoughts we dwell on. Choose to dwell on positive, motivating thoughts!

Dazed and Confused

Over the weekend I had the opportunity to celebrate my sister, Salli’s, 39th Birthday.  Typically my family gets together for each one of our birthdays.  Since there are only 3 of us girls (I’m the middle one) it’s pretty manageable.

This year my sister coordinated the whole celebration by inviting us to go to Richardson’s Corn Maze in Spring Grove.  I’ve lived in this area for many years and have never been even though it’s world famous.  So I thought it would be a lot of fun and I was right.  It’s a great place to visit in the fall if you like sitting around a fire, drinking cider, watching the kids bury themselves in the “corn” box and working your way through a giant corn maze in the mud.  Oh I have to tell you this – as we were eating the world’s largest hamburgers that my brother-in-law cooked over the fire, it started to downpour leaving many people soaked.  Even though the rain only lasted a couple of minutes people quickly ran out of the farm and headed home.

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After the rain cleared I decided to give the corn maze a try.  As I walked in with my husband, son and niece I soon discovered that there were many ways you could get dazed and confused and end up wandering around for hours with no sense of where specifically you were.  I remember coming to the first fork in the maze and thinking: Which way do we go?  I wasn’t leading so thankfully I was not left to my own fruition. But I was walking behind every one else so if they moved too far ahead of me, I could have easily gotten lost.

I’m sharing this with you in this week’s tip because I know that there are members of your team who can easily get confused with the direction that they’re supposed to take or panic and run for shelter when the down pouring of issues to handle hits them hard.  Sometimes they may feel lost and need a little direction and sometimes – when they feel this way – they may not seek appropriate help from you and other members of your team.

One suggestion I have for you is to practice handling or role-playing difficult situations and putting into practice constructive actions so team members have a clear path to a successful outcome in any given situation.   This is such an important (and under utilized) success strategy.

Another option to consider is to have team members write down difficult situations that they’ve encountered throughout the month.  Then at your staff meeting talk about the different paths that can be taken and where each one of those paths leads.  Some paths are constructive, while others are destructive.  Team members may have taken some destructive paths and that’s okay to share.  It’s a great learning opportunity for your entire team.

When role-playing and discussing these situations be careful not to fall into negative gossip about parents or others who are not present.  Help keep your team’s focus on facts and solutions.  The outcome will be a team that proactively knows (without being dazed and confused) the right path to follow and what constructive actions will get them through their maze quickly and effectively.

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Please post your comments below.

Giving Your Staff Feedback: Sugar and Sandwiches

FeedbacksmallerThe ability to get and give feedback is a practice that can propel your organization to reach new heights. However, there are many ineffective methods that leaders implement when trying to get and give feedback.

Here are a couple for you to consider. It’s kind of funny that they both have to do with food – sugar and sandwiches!

I’ll share with you the ineffective method of sugar coating first. Many times, leaders with their big hearts say to themselves: “Oh, I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings so I won’t be as blunt as I should be” or “Today is not a good day to share that information because of the way she will react.” It’s important to understand that although your intent is good when you sugar coat feedback – - it is a dangerous style of communication, especially if there are behavioral issues that NEED to be addressed. When you sugar coat things, the employee gets the impression that everything is wonderful and dandy. And in the back of your mind you’re thinking, “Oh, my gosh! I wish they would change this. I wish they would do this differently. Why can’t they stop this?”

There are also potential legal issues that you have to be careful of. Imagine a situation where you have an employee who really needs to make behavioral changes. You provide them with feedback. You don’t quite want to tell it to them like it is, so you sugar coat it. That’s documented. Then later on, things get worse and worse and worse. You keep sugar coating until one day you just fire the person. There have been law suits filed against employers where there’s not proper documentation in place to show that this employee was exhibiting poor behaviors and then given the opportunity to make constructive change happen. So be very careful with the nature of your conversations and how you’re giving that feedback. Think twice before you sugar coat things. Also remember, when you sugar coat, you’re also cheating your employees out of the opportunity to make constructive change happen.

Now let’s move on to sandwiches. The other thing I’d like to caution you about when looking at giving feedback is the Sandwich Technique. Do you know what this is? The Sandwich Technique is a method of communication. You start off on a positive note, put the constructive stuff (negative feedback) in the middle and then finish on a positive note. On one of our audio programs at the Leadership Connection, Dr. Aubrey Daniels joined us. The issue was titled Positively Reinforcing Staff. He shared how the Sandwich Technique can really leave people feeling confused. They may walk away not really knowing if your message was positive or negative and unclear about the change you’re recommending. This means when the Sandwich Technique is used to provide feedback, the message that we need the person to hear isn’t heard.

Ease up on sugar and sandwiches and not only will you lose weight, you’ll also take a load off of your mind through communicating directly and giving your staff the feedback that they need to hear to make constructive change happen.